Forgiveness

Quite a few of my friends posted ".... Please forgive me for any wrongdoings I have done..." on their status on Facebook and GoogleTalk. I'm not the one who forgives easily unless the person's touched my heart. I know that holding grudges isn't good but the feeling usually goes away and I don't think much about them unless they are brought up. There are very few people that I have a hard time forgiving because I like a lot of people who have entered in my world.

So today, I decided that the most important person whom I should ask for forgiveness is my landlady. She is still a nut. But things have normalized in the past week and I didn't see her as much as I did before. I wanted to show her that I did care (mainly to keep my deposit) and I respected her house. So while she was doing some yard work this morning, I stopped and said to her, "I just want to ask for your forgiveness for any harm I've done to you. That is all." She accepted it.

(I also reminded her a little that it's a Jewish holiday since it seemed like she already accepted my forgiveness).

Now where to go from here? I will tell my roommates tomorrow night that she is welcomed to come when Claire cooks in two weeks.

Thanks, friends, for a little social pressure. Thanks, technology, whatever would we do without you?

Voter's Remorse

Yes, yes, Sarah Palin was just way, way too scary for me, as a woman. I just... couldn't vote for that team so as long she refused to provide rape kits for victims. I suppose that her views of abortion and sexual health were my biggest pet peeves because her views were just anti-feminist. Women need to be protected from personal invasion.

But does Israel need to be protected from Iran? Yes. I couldn't trust Sarah Palin enough- I doubt that she even knew much about Israel and the origin of the Israeli-Arab conflict before joining McCain. Obama, however, had some sense.

These days... well... since probably May, I've been feeling this "buyer's remorse" for voting for Obama. Since Cairo speech, really. It's nice that he's succeeded in convincing Muslims to stop being "anti-American". He's got excellent speechwriters but damn, those speechwriters quietly pissed off plenty of Jews and Israelis. The Israelis and I are not happy that he has yet to visit Israel since the previous summer. Who am I kidding? I once thought he was a faithful Christian. And faithful Christians were supposed to support Israel. I think that Cairo speech hurt my affinity for Obama and changed my views of the Arabs. (I must admit that I was also stunned by a fellow Jewish Colgate aluma's decision to join the Arab side after witnessing Operation Cast Lead from Cairo). What Obama lacked to understand was that within the Israeli-Arab debate, you just could not stand on the fence. The conflict itself was too ingrained in history, very much like Russia and its national states, or China and Taiwan. With that Cairo speech, Obama officially declared his position as pro-Palestinian by sympathizing with the Palestinians' plight. Obama claimed that to be a good friend, you must be able to criticize constructively. But I disagree with this method. He basically told Israel to stop settlement building, which was the heart of Zionism. He striked me as anti-Zionist.

And that began to annoy a lot of American Jews, A whole lot of them. We're beginning to think about voting Republican next time. If Obama doesn't do something to placate American Jews before 2010 elections, we're going to see Republican controlled Senate, depending how many seats are up for election.

Norman Podhoretz's article in Wall Street Journal was pretty similar to those that I read for my American Jews and Social Justice seminar last spring. But his conclusion differed from other writers as it reflected today's events. He said, "

What I am saying is that if anything bears eloquent testimony to the infinitely precious virtues of the traditional American system, it is the Jewish experience in this country. Surely, then, we Jews ought to be joining with its defenders against those who are blind or indifferent or antagonistic to the philosophical principles, the moral values, and the socioeconomic institutions on whose health and vitality the traditional American system depends.

In 2008, we were faced with a candidate who ran to an unprecedented degree on the premise that the American system was seriously flawed and in desperate need of radical change—not to mention a record powerfully indicating that he would pursue policies dangerous to the security of Israel. Because of all this, I hoped that my fellow Jews would finally break free of the liberalism to which they have remained in thrall long past the point where it has served either their interests or their ideals.

That possibility having been resoundingly dashed, I now grasp for some encouragement from the signs that buyer's remorse is beginning to set in among Jews, as it also seems to be doing among independents. Which is why I am hoping against hope that the exposure of Mr. Obama as a false messiah will at last open the eyes of my fellow Jews to the correlative falsity of the political creed he so perfectly personifies and to which they have for so long been so misguidedly loyal."

Thing is, many of my social values align with the Democrat Party. I strongly believe that the needy, children, and low-income families must be helped by state and federal governments. I am a large supporter of women's rights. I believe that Americans should get assistance for their education. Okay, call me socialist. I also support gay rights- whatever makes the gays happy. But I am still against abortion unless it's for stem cell research because A) teenagers are stupid and women should pay for it by carrying the baby for 9 months, B) The waiting list for adoptions are endless, and C) psychological damage from the procedure. Not because it's in the Bible.

I inherited my values from being in super-liberal academia (Smith and Michigan, anyone?), not so much from my family as researchers suggested as major contributers to children's political values. My family and I rarely discussed politics for a long time. My parents are independents although my mother tends to vote Democrat. I read a lot of humanist and socialist works when I took European history and they influenced how I wanted to envision my life. French Revolution was a great idea, seriously. I loved Rousseau's ideas of how to teach children to be worldly. And I stand by Jefferson's words that we all have the right to have "life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness." If I was a colonist, I could never be a Loyalist/Tory.

Israel had never entered in my picture until this past election. When I voted in 2004, it was more of being anti-war and I was very afraid of Bush's desire to exploit civil liberties such as his National Protection Agency. In 2008 election, as I've discussed before, I was on the fence for a long time because McCain was actually pretty moderate and didn't strike me as someone who would abuse his power.

I hadn't actually thought much about my values being connected to Judaism until I took this social justice seminar. It seemed to me just a concidence. I also figured that Israel could take care of itself as long the Israelis like our Secretary of State and the State Department. And as Israel have already demonstrated, if it didn't want to listen to our President, it didn't have to unless military aid is really at stake. Like, it won't strike Iran without the aid of US military.

So what am I regretting now? Probably having this consciousness that the fact that I have a strong Jewish identity, that I align with the Democrat Party, and that I vote based on social justice issues. So that makes me appear to be aligning with the Democrat party out of American Jewish tradition. Yet, when I see Republican controlled Senate in Michigan and California, I am infuriated with their "solutions" to close the budget deficit. This is what would happen if we have total Republican control in Washington. How can Republicans cut social and educational programs at the expense of low-income and children? That's our next generation. It's true- you can take out loans for college but you can't take out loans for retirement. But why should we shortchange potential leaders?

Who am I supposed to vote for in the next election? Should we get a third party in? Should I stop factoring in Israel? After all, it IS the Congress who controls the President's ability to act- including declaring a war. That's the beauty of our check and balance system. Maybe I should focus more on keeping the Congress Democratic to ensure social justice in America while having a Republican president who can keep Israel happy. Bush did have a heck of time trying to pass anything that he really wanted once the Democrats took over in 2006. Yet, the Democrats had trouble getting themselves together (although I'd attribute to this that it's the first time in 12 years that the Democrats were in charge).

Sometimes I have a hard time believing that I am living in the United States, the land that many foreigners dream of living in. They're coming from socialist countries, not capitalist like America. I have a lot of respect for American history and traditions, which is part of why I agree with the consensus that America can never go democratic socialist like Britian and France. It's just not meant to be according to the Constitution. Health care is... another story.