Back in the US

After waiting for an hour with Linda and Maayan at the airport to find out the status, we found out that Air Canada was able to take me in as their last stand-by passenger. I don't know what was going through my mind, I had gone this far, and I just couldn't turn around. Maayan had been fantastic setting things straight in Hebrew with the manager. While I waited to get my ticket, we watched the family ahead of us- probably two sisters and a little three year old daughter. The little girl looked almost like me when I was her age with the brown eyes and soft, curly brown hair pulled back in a little ponytail.

Flight home was verrryyy long, much longer than I thought. For some reason I was thinking it was 10 hours but it was more like 12 hours...

Anyway, it was so weird coming back to the US from Israel. It was like stepping in a mirror to another world. Yet, everything was familiar, the hugs of my parents, riding in their cars, finding food in the kitchen... I also felt pretty cold in 70 degree temperatures!

I felt pretty conflicted in the first two or three days, figuring out what I had done. It was almost a snap decision but also a long one too. I realized that coming back to the US will always be difficult as much I enjoy being with my friends and family here. Thoughts of aliyah will be there but what Linda wrote in her last e-mail that it's more important that I make the most of every visit and make them joyful rather than suffer from them.

Even though my trip started out a bit rocky, I always strived to have good days. As Lance Armstrong once said, "There are no bad days, I only have good or great days." I think that this was particularly important to keep in mind when living in a country like Israel. We all kept our chins up, for good or for bad, through everything. Now having been there for another extended trip, I saw why so few American Jews would wish to return for and endure another such trip. It did sound fantastic to be on the beach everyday or explore the Galilee or stroll along the streets of Tel Aviv, it's when you begin dealing with day-to-day issues that took a certain amount of patience, perseverence, and good will to go through them. Especially if you're still learning Hebrew. I could see in my classmates' faces towards the end of ulpan that it was not just the ulpan but living in Israel in general that was getting to them. They're excited to get back to the comforts of geniune customer service, comfortable mattresses, safer roads, and other things that they took for granted in their countries.

In my perspective, there's no such thing as perfect world and we just have to deal with what we're given. Like the ugly and confusing architecture in Tel Aviv and limited choices of pasta.

Last Few Days in Israel

Wow, I've been soooo tired and unable to think straight by 9:30, when we finish dinner, to write anything!

On Monday, I spent the whole day in Tel Aviv. I caught the 501 bus out to Azrielli Center, where Air Canada's office was located. I had to give the security my passport for official ID (my student ID was no good, much to my protest that Air Canada might want to see my passport) and a security tag to actually get in. The receptionist was so incredibly nice to help me out. She asked for my booking number and I gave it to her out of my head- it was easy to remember because the first three letters spelled my uncle's name with the vowel missing, the next two were 10 point letters in a Scrabble game, and the last one just reminded me of the A as in Andrew. I really surprised myself! So anyway, she told me that the flights were very full and it would be very difficult to get on but Wednesday night had some empty seats. She said to call her on Wednesday morning to check on the status.

I went exploring the Azrielli mall, supposedly Tel Aviv's fanciest mall. It was quite upscale in its design and some of the stores and food offerings. Then I decided to walk on Kaplan Street which changed into Dizengoff, thankfully given that I knew it would lead me to Dizengoff mall. It intersected with King Goerge so I knew where I was immediately. I stopped in the Dizengoff mall for more air-conditioning time and bought Dubliners, a collection of short stories by James Joyce (later a framework for his masterpiece, Ulysses). I just needed a short and light book to tide me over for a week.

Then I browsed through clothing stores along King George and Shenkin. On Shenkin, I found an amazing designer, The Third Eye, that had incredible, great, bohemian style clothes. This designer is definitely on my list for must-go-back. I bought a green cotton dress that's going to be very easy to wear for anything and in all seasons except for winter. Afterwards, I headed off to the beach for the afternoon. The waves were so ridiculously strong that I didn't even go back in after only 10 minutes of playing in it (and getting wiped out).

After the beach, I thought I'd get some ice coffee but felt the craving for pizza so I bought a slice off the street from a guy who thought it was wonderful that I was from America. It's really true that Israelis love Americans but too bad he wouldn't let me have a free slice! :) Then I decided that if I really wasn't going to be in Israel after Wednesday, I ought to visit the little Russian market down further on Allenby. After the visit and a couple of Russian chocolates, I realized that this was really a pseudo Russian market in comparison to the one in Haifa and not really go back there again. I also found my "3 DVDs for 100 shekels" guy but didn't really see any DVDs that I wanted to get.

To get my excerise, I walked all the way back to where I was dropped off this morning.

To pacify my little homesickness for pizza, Yasmin decided that we'd order pizza for dinner as Linda was working late at her nursing job. I knew that she or somebody would want olives (it's treated like pepperoni in Israel- super popular topping) so just as she asked if I liked olives or mushrooms, I told her to make it half and half because I didn't like olives.

Tuesday, I took my time and decided that I would stop in Tel Aviv's Carmel Market first just to see if there was anything and then go to Jerusalem. I took the 48 bus which dropped me off right near the market. I found nothing and began walking towards the bus station (where I was yesterday). On the way, I found a cute red dress but decided that I really, really didn't need it and would get it if I was still in Israel on Thursday. Then I saw Iceberg, a gelato place highly recommended by Einut, my Israeli roommate in Haifa. Although I just had the Druze pita snack, I hadn't had any gelato.... so I got half dark chocolate and half tiramusu. That was quite worthwhile and delicious- I could really taste the flavors! Then I got right to the bus station and caught the bus on time.

When I got to Jerusalem, I stopped by the shuk to pick up Syrah from Yarden (2003) that I liked so much from last Friday, some olive oil for Mom, and some mangos and breakfast pastries from Marizpan. Since my processor still wasn't working properly, I decided to try out lip-reading in Hebrew. When I discovered that I could, I smiled when I gave them the correct change! Slowly, but surely, I'm getting that down pat too. I'd like to meet some deaf Israelis though so they can tell me what to watch out for when lipreading in Hebrew.

I made my way down to Rehavia to visit the Pollacks. I used my Hebrew to find the street since Rehavia wasn't all neatly and organized in terms of its streets. I also used my memory from when I walked there on Shabbat with Grandma and Zev. But the first people I asked didn't really quite know where Hanassi was so I gave them another street- Palmach. Then a young guy on Palmach knew where to go and he gave me the directions. I wanted to bring them flowers but I couldn't find any good flower shops along the way.

Moshe and Phyllis were doing great and finishing up preparing a dairy dinner for their daughter, Danna and her family, including her three children and in-laws. Phyllis listened to me explain what was happening with my processor since she works in occupational therapy with a lot of children who have cochlear implants. She offered to set up an appointment with her friend who does cochlear implant but I told her the main problem was getting insurance to cover the appointment. Then we talked about my trip thus far and my graduate school plans. When her family asked about my plans on returning to the US, I said that I wasn't one-hundred percent sure yet and Phyllis looked at me and insisted that I was on stand-by for my flight Wednesday night.

During the dinner, a lot of the conversation was in Hebrew. I could pick up words here and there and really paid attention to the children since they're harder to understand. But from my experience with children, it's a great way to learn a language because they're also learning it and figuring out how to express themselves. They all said that they liked to speak in Hebrew better, especially the seven year old girl with soooo many gaps in her mouth because she lost a lot of teeth recently. One boy told Moshe (his grandfather) that he could also read in English too! Just as I was missing salmon, Phyllis served it! So I was happy having the salmon, some tuna patties, humuus from the shuk (yes, it's really that much better than the ones in the stores), and pita. Then I began wondering why do I need to back to the US.

That's just the most difficult part. As I began thinking about going back to the US while my processor was holding steady, I asked, why do I need to leave Israel? But when I turn it off and then back on, then I wished that I was back in America. These past few days have been a real emotional rollercoaster just trying to deal with the worst hearing aid problem I've ever had. I asked Phyllis before I left what she meant by saying that I was brave (Course, I knew I was always brave to be in Israel and dealing with Hebrew), she said exactly what I thought she meant. Then I asked her about my speech. She bluntly said that "it could be better" and felt that she really needed to ask me to slow down and speak clearer. I sort of felt that punch that I should really try to do the stand-by tomorrow night as much I didn't really want to leave the country, only for my own good.

Moshe gave me a ride to the CBS, thankfully. We quickly talked about the shekel value against the dollar and real estate in Jerusalem (he's in real estate). He thought on the long run, the dollar would be better to use for real estate than the shekel. he predicted that the real estate bubble in Jerusalem will collapse because of the bad economy in the US and affect investment in Israel. It's always a risk to invest in real estate in Israel because of the security concerns, he said.

I quietly said shalom to Jerusalem and tried hard not to think much about the next twenty-four hours.

On Wednesday morning, I decided to stay in Herzliya. I didn't feel any need to go into Tel Aviv and I just wanted a quiet day. I eventually called Air Canada around 10:30 AM to break the suspense. First, it took me, what felt like ages to turn on the processor, and I just hit the boiling point. I held on as I called Air Canada around 10:30 AM to find out the story. The woman told me that the flight tonight was full and absolutely no seats left unless I wanted to pay over a thousand dollars for a first-class seat. After I hang up, I broke down in tears as I called my parents, waking them up at 3 AM. I wasn't sure what to do. I wanted to stay so much but I was just so tired of dealing with the processor and just go home and not have to wear it ever again.

Finally, I calmed down a bit and decided that I would go to the beach just for the sake of being the last time. Ahout a third of the way, I kept thinking that I really should go for a run. It had been a week because A) It was so hot out and B) I wanted to try giving my knee a little break. But I needed someone to tell me to go for a run.... eventually I turned around, bought a bottle of cold water, and threw on my running clothes and went out. I ran out to the beach and back (though actually walked the last mile because the heat was really getting to me). I did 5 miles in 48 minutes, very good for 93 degree heat index! I did feel much more relaxed when I came back.

I took a shower and went to the mall for some Cafe Aroma. When I got up to get a cookie, some idiotic employee cleared away my table of my Ice Aroma, a Sudoku puzzle that I was working on, and everything else I had, along with my trash. I got pissed off and turned around when I saw my cleared table and met the employee's eyes immediately. She realized that she had done something wrong and dashed back to get my stuff. I glared at her as i took my stuff from her and set the stuff on the table. Then I realized that I hadn't finished my Ice Aroma so I went over and explained to other employees who were standing about and one of them referred me to the manager. The manager dutifully went over and got me another Ice Aroma, free of charge. Now that's what I call customer service!!!!

I told Linda of this little incident when she came home and was shocked. I said that I knew that you're not really supposed to leave bags around in Israel but I went past the security and I had my stuff spread out so it wasn't like.... I intentionally left it behind to create a bomb attack. She agreed.

Shiri, one of my cousins, finally called to say that she was back in Herzliya and we made a time for me to go over to her place. I finished up packing, which wasn't any more difficult than when I left Haifa. My main concern was the bottles of wine and olive oil. I wrapped the olive oil in the bubble wrap that my mother gave me and my blue bath towel. For the wine, first, I wrapped it in my white-and-yellow beach towel, then my long green skirt, and finally, my black Colgate stadium blanket. We'll just have to see if this can make it.

Shiri was so happy to see me that she held on longer than I expected when we hugged in greeting. Her sister, Olga, was also home along with Rahel. As we ate a light dinner, everyone updated me about their family, including Steven, who recently had a baby. Zev, no wedding date yet..... Then Rahel showed me her documentary about her travel with a group and Shiri to the birth place of her family in Ukraine. It was very interesting in a way that it's almost like a "birthright trip." As I watched it, I could imagine what my experience might be like when I have a chance to visit Lithuania and Belorussia, where my dad's family emigrated from. Although the setting have changed as the Germans destroyed a lot of the towns, it barely changed. It was still largely a peasant town, relying mostly on agriculture, horse and buggy, and simple life. Although very little of Jewish life survived, the memory remained as evident by memorials, either in a large statue form or a cemetery. It seemed like visiting Russia's former Soviet states and Poland would be quite bit like visiting Prague and Germany, where people just move on without the Jews and have memorials in place to remember them by. It was a good film overall and I told Rahel that I think it would have success in the US since American Jews are interested in their roots and probably will feel the kinship more so than the Israelis because so many of us were Ashkenzai and grew up in a Yiddish-Eastern European dominated culture. (And I was craving for my Eastern European food.)

Now it's time to head off to the airport to see what happens... I could feel that I really wanted to stay but the volume was definitely not holding up as much as it should as everyone's voices around me began to get softer and softer.

Caesarea!

I knew I wanted to visit Caesarea just because it's a good tourist stop and it was supposed to be scheduled on my taglit trip but we never made it. I never made to the park when I visited it with family and friends in the extremely upscale neighborhood. When I mentioned this to the Ravids, they looked at me as "how the hell are you planning to get there?" I shrugged and asked them if they had any better ideas than taking the train. They said no....
I arrived at Caesarea train stop without a hitch. The rumors about Israeli trains being quite nice inside were very true- they beat NJ Transit and LIRR trains with a little table for your drinks and more comfortable seats! When I got off the train, suddenly I could tell that I was in for a bit of an adventure because A) the station was tiny and practically non-existent B) the sea was nowhere in sight and C) the place did not look one bit familiar as I remembered. So I began walking around looking for the sea or signs to the park. After wandering for half hour and almost walked along the highway, I decided to head back to the train station. I began thinking, "I hate Caesarea already. This isn't Israel. That joke ring so true- it's 10 minutes from Israel." I considered giving up and just going back to Herzliya if the cab didn't come within reasonable time. A cab came to drop off a passenger but a family of girls beat me to it even though I already called for a cab. I grumbled and sat around for another 10 minutes even though I already overheard the cabbie calling for another cab to come and get me. Finally that cab came. The driver wanted 40 shekels to get there and I figured that sounded reasonable giving that I didn't see any signs of life relating to the old park during my wanderings. I realize that the train station must be built exclsuively for the businesses in "Caesarea Park," a largely business oriented park like office parks in the US. Idiot Israelis for making this completely untourist-y friendly.
After a 10-15 minute ride, I made it to the more familiar sights of beautiful houses and old ruins. There was a guy right at the entrance selling cut up watermelons and offering to squeeze oranges for a freshly squeeze OJ. I was tempted to buy the watermelons but since it was 12:30, I had no idea how long those things had been sitting out... I paid for my ticket at student discount and made my way in.
Caesarea has a very interesting history, a bit of reminder of Jerusalem's history, where many different rulers took over the city and reshaped it each time. Some parts of Caesarea were built over by later rulers. It used to be a huge, huge place to be because it was a port and King Herod wanted to make this one of the grandest cities in Palestine aside from Jerusalem. Obviously, this was dedicated to King Augustus Caesar. After the Great Revolt in 60-70 C.E. and Jerusalem was destroyed, the Romans made this the capital of Roman Palestine. Caesarea was also a place where the father of the Misnah, Rabbi Akivah, was tortured and executed by the Romans a bit later on. After Caesarea fell under Muslim hands, the flourishing city dwindled into a little Arab village. When I examined the different sites and found evidence of changing rulers, Caesarea did indeed remind me of Jerusalem except it isn't just as well perserved.

So as you can see from the photographs that the archeaologists never really "fixed" the place like they did with Masada. It made it more tricky to navigate the grounds with a pair of flip flops. So wear sneakers!

The entrance to the park through one of the old watch towers.

The seats for the public baths.... they didn't look too comfortable!

The seats of the amphitheater. The amphitheater was shaped in a U to allow for horse chariot races (like in the movie Ben-Hur). It was pretty cool to scale it given that I'm an equestrian fan and imagining all the entertainment that went on here.

I decided to climb on some "roofs" but I think that the actual roofs were gone and these might've been the floors of some of the houses. That was very cool to see mosaics and they were in pretty good condition considering it's been thousands of years! My most exciting find all day.

Some more places but can't quite remember what they were...

Oh, this was the view from the upper palace!

After I passed the amphitheater, I went up to see the grounds of the upper palace and this enormous theater. It totally reminded me of the Mega Event on my birthright trip because we had a similar Roman-style theater. It was definitely beautiful. And that was all of it. I went back to the entrance along the beach. Much to my disgust, I found that the sand unappealing as it was quite heavy and had to manually clean out my flip-flops and feet to get rid of it- it's more heavy rocky sand like in Maine.

I explored some of the artisan shops that had Roman glass beads. The jewelry was very pretty. There was supposed to be a Cats' Quarter but I think it's just a joke that the cats just make their home in that particular area of the park. Then I saw the signs for more sites- the Church. The Church grounds were shaped like an octogan.

Then I stopped for a quick lunch of roasted eggplant with labaneh and bread and drank some ice coffee (I had been drinking my big water bottle...). Afterwards, I stopped in Ester S's shop and there, I saw the most beautiful Israeli art pieces I have seen thus far in Israel. (http://www.ester-shahaf.com/). She had the most gorgeous Shabbat candles but I couldn't decide whether to get them or not but I opted to get a wall decoration of a Star of David with Israel written on it for my new apartment in Michigan. I'd love to have more of her stuff. I asked her if she sold at the Carmel Market and she said no but has small collections in stores all over Israel but this was her flagship and she sells them at face value rather than additional profits that her sellers get.

I went for a little walk to see how far away the famous adaqucents were but it turned out a little too far. So I rounded around another ancient site that I wasn't sure exactly what it was. By then, it was 4 PM and I figured that I could have the next half hour or hour to jump in the water to cool off. Then I found out that it cost 20 shekels just to get into the beach and I told them to forget it. Finally, I asked the woman at the entrance if there was a bus out and she said the next one wouldn't be for another 2 hours and asked if she could call a cab for me and I said fine.

The cab driver took me to the wrong train station- to Binyamin instead of Caesarea. I told him that I had a ticket from Caesarea to Herzliya and he came with me to the ticket counter in Binyamin to make sure my ticket would still be good and the woman said I should be fine. So I waited a goooodddd half hour for the train. Yes, Israel Railways need some work on its frequency. But the train wasn't crowded as I feared for some reason.

I was very glad to be back at the kibbutz and went straight to the bathroom to clean off my dirty feet! I realized that every since I landed in Israel, I wore my sandals nearly everyday except for one or two days. I did wear my sandals a lot when I interned in D.C. but I wore my sneakers aplenty during my commute. It was just weird thinking about how my feet have rarely been clean.

For dinner, all the girls were home and Linda made chicken and pineapple stir-fry with a light touch of soy sauce. It was fun seeing what life would've been like if i had sisters... the conversation was definitely different than say... with my own brother! Suddenly, things revolved around boys, Yasmin's crazy beach hair, the awesome necklace that Maayan had on... I could see that Shlomi was bored by all of this but I think he's proud to have such independent daughters who can think for themselves.

Tomorrow, off to Tel Aviv to see what Air Canada's up to.

Weekend in Herzliya #1

Thursday night went without a hitch. Linda and Shlomi had to leave for a dinner for Linda's work so I had the house, the dog, and the (nasty) cat to myself for a couple hours before Yasmin came home from hanging out in town on her way back from Beersheba (where she's studying). Yasmin and I caught up a bit while she made a mess in the kitchen because one of the cake pans leaked. I was really tired so I crashed around 10:30- very early for me.

I slept in late again- about 9:30 AM. I slept in Ofek's bed which, I late found out, has two mattress on top of one and another. Yasmin joked that Ofek's so sensitive like that story of the Princess and the Mattress. But they're going to give one of the mattresses to the Sudanese soon anyway. Linda brought over two Sudanese to help them pick up an old washing machine in Tel Aviv and drive them back. Adam and Mohammad were very nice and chatty. They had great English but so-so Hebrew (they just finished Bet). While Adam pruned one of the trees, Mohammad and I practiced our Hebrew a bit and I learned that he came here just a few years ago and his family would come soon and on their way (they just have to survive the minefields of Egypt, I mean, it's practically a death zone). They were very pleasant and I could see that they worked very hard to survive and live in Israel- I was told that although they're supported by an organization, they still have to pay a lot of things that Jewish olims don't have to like ulpan.



When they left, including Maayan and Yasmin who were heading to the North for some friend's party, I set out to check out the mall in Herzliya, near the kibbutz, to see what Cellcom had to offer for cellphones. It was pretty hot! I did find some possible running routes that will keep me in shape but I don't know. It really is hot here and I have to wear that knee brace... Anyway, I made it to the mall and it felt great to be in an air conditioning building! The mall was pretty busy! I stopped at Steinmisky's to pick up J-Post and then to Cellcom. They didn't have much of anything that I wanted so I might have to try another Cellcom store in Tel Aviv. I also stopped by the computer store to check out the laptops. There were some very nice laptops that I'd like to have to replace mine. I wondered if it would be cheaper to buy one here since I can get a VAT. The one I was interested in the most, HP Pavilion Dz2700 series for 4300 shekels ($1,230) with the tax in it. The guys didn't know how much the tax was... so I just left the store.

I came back and we had a quick hot lunch. I tagged along with Linda to run errands and pick up Anat. For the rest of the afternoon, we all just hung out and read papers and watched movies on tv. I catnapped a bit.

While I was talking to Linda in the car, she asked about my summers in DC and I told her how much I loved working for the USHMM and living in DC. I told her that I had gone back for a couple days in June and just basically forgot how much I enjoyed working with these people and living in the city, She basically said that as much she loves living in Israel, it's still hard for her to gain reputation in her workplace and it was important to go where I have good reputation for my first serious job. That's going to be something to ask Allie and the Pollacks about when I see them.

We had Victoria and her new husband, Dani, over for Shabbat dinner. She cut her hair which made her look older but she looked pretty anyway. It seemed like it had been a while since they had gotten together with the Ravids so there was some conversation of catching up and jokes. I enjoyed it all very much. Victoria made a delicious apple-walnut salad that I should e-mail her for the dressing recipe. Linda attempted to make a whole fish- it was huge! It didn't cook thoroguhly at first so we ate a bit while we waited for it to finish. I'm not sure if people were thrilled to see the fish, especially its bones and the head, or not...

On Saturday, I got up a bit late and showered while Linda made breakfast. I stayed inside pretty much the whole day because I was flipping out and trying to rectify the problem with my processor. I began considering leaving Israel early just because if it wasn't going to cooperate and hold out long enough for me to see Melissa on Sunday, then what was the point? I wanted to be able to give my audiologist a big time frame to work with. It's not always easy to wait for the US to wake up since it's 7 hour difference! I kept myself occupied by catching up with the inews online and reading some more J-Post and worked on some Hebrew translations. Then Linda made a hot afternoon lunch and I talked about my research interests in relation to the Diaspora and about my friend Ceci's upcoming Watson fellowship travel trip around North Africa/Middle East to explore the Muslim perspective of the Jewish emigration to Israel. They listened to everything. Talking it out a bit made me reailze although I love learning about the society in Israel, the Diaspora holds greater interest because of the ultimate internal Jewish connection. Once you're in Israel, you're always surrounded by Jews and living on the land but Diaspora has greater challenges of keeping Jews connected from afar.

After lunch, I talked with my parents a bit to discuss my hearing aid issue. Then I went for an hour long walk to clear my head and explore central Herzliya. I came back and Maayan and Yasmin returned from their party which was literally on the Syria-Israel border. After Yasmin left to visit Jerusalem for the night, Maayan did all the story-telling. They had driven up to Akko and Nahariyya to eat some hummos, dirt cheap candy and dried fruit, visit some cousin of their friend, basically just wandering along the road. The party played "trans-music" which in Maayan's definition is techno-music. Ew, I'm glad I definitely didn't go. It did sound very weird- I think it was their first time doing such thing- where it's pretty secretive and people don't know the exact location until at least several hours beforehand and you have to be inside the network. Uh-huh... From the way Maayan described people's dress and behavior, it was Woodstock in Israel with people being high and in dreadlocks.

After all that, we had dinner and I eventually went to sleep.